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cow vampireSpringfield Republican , November 17, 1895. Said to labor under the hallucination that he is a vampire?! The first time I read that, I thought, ‘Who the hell has the nerve to question this guy’s monster credentials?’ But it’s true that he lacks the suavity of your classic, card-carrying 19th-century vampire type. Diet and behavior-wise, he could almost be a chupacabra foraging outside of its regular habitat, but those are reputed to be ugly suckers that wouldn’t long pass for human even in South Dakota.
cow vampire2 So a fortnight prior to November 17 establishes the exciting attack on Jack Lewis as taking place in mid-September and just after 6:00pm. That sounds too early for post-sunset (anybody out there got an almanac handy?). My best guess would be that this was a werewolf suffering from hydrophobia, who’d therefore lost his instincts for self-preservation. Sun was probably down by then, so it must have been a werewolf. Case closed.


  1. Duh ,… I allus thought a fortnight was two weeks, no es verdad?

    • Ah jeez. I know you’re probably way behind in your work, Quince, but would you mind being a bit more timely with the proofreading?

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