Chicago Tribune, February 9, 1896. Brining in saltpeter? Lame! He’d have gotten superior results with a rub made of sage, paprika, garlic powder and dry mustard.
They’d save more money still if only they adopted Professor Petri’s Amazing Odorless Poo Briquets® as a fuel source. “They’re the shit!”™
“Disconsolate” because he couldn’t smoke a dead wino? Guy seems a little high-strung for a man of science–a Colin Clive type I guess. Creative sort.
“No one but the doctor knows just what condition the cadaver was in when the smoke-house was opened, and he won’t tell” –riveting opening sentence for a Frank G. Slaughter-style novel about a selfless but tortured scientist questing to perfect a technique for barbecuing dead winos.
So not just winos but, um, visiting Bedouins requiring posthumous repatriation?