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huitresMacon Telegraph, June 17, 1889. Can you believe it? We’re talking here about an average sororal poundage of 175. And yet, this is a mere bagatelle in relation to some of the ensuing prodigies. For example:
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Fishing for owls. Okay, that’s fucked up.

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That’s fucked up too, because everybody knows that it’s correctly spelled “asafoetida.”
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Burdening pals with eccentric requests as to the disposal one’s remains is a folkway ripe for revival. Gram Parsons: Die like him!

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It’s 1889 and we’re already talking this depressing chat about how nothing tastes any good since transportation was invented. Does anybody still grow the tiny, egg-fragile heirloom watermelons of yester-yester-yesteryear? I’d like to taste the real article before I die.

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Interesting footnote to the Moynihan Report: When a brother was keen to marry back in the day, his reward was to get slagged by the media.

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Pretty funny last sentence, in a glacially unfeeling sort of way. Let no one think that “snark” is a recent journalistic innovation.

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I can totally believe that this ballsy gal was locally a “well-known character.” I leave it up to you all as to whether she’s being a race traitor or merits credit for putting the “Ms.” in miscegenation.

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5 Comments

  1. Does anybody still grow the tiny, egg-fragile heirloom watermelons of yester-yester-yesteryear? I’d like to taste the real article before I die.

    We get tiny little watermelons over here. They’re typically grown in Spain. They’re round, and somewhere between the size of a standard ten-pin bowling ball and a duckpin bowling ball. The rinds are thinner than what you get on a typical American watermelon, but not eggshell thin.

    We’re talking here about an average sororal poundage of 175.

    I could see this being newsworthy if the sisters were all between the ages of 1 and 6. Otherwise… no.

    • Are they awesome, these duckpin melon from Spain?

      >I could see this being newsworthy if the sisters were all between the ages of 1 and 6. Otherwise… no.

      Yes, the bloom is off the rose on this particular item.

  2. The little watermelons we get are nice. The best description I can come up with is that the flavor is more dense than watermelons I’ve had in the USA. They’re juicier and maybe a little sweeter. They also almost never have seeds in them. Otherwise, I don’t really think you’re missing much.

  3. Do any of you melon-munchers have a problem with finding seeds in your watermelon?

    • Yeah: the p’too is easily one half of the pleasure. They do draw yellow-jackets though.


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